...how do you know?

When is it ok to settle? When is it ok to hold out for something better? When is it time to make it work, or run like a scared lamb?

Dating, sexing, texting, chatting, tweeting, meeting, loving, befriending, hugging, kissing any type of interaction with the opposite sex has become dreadful as physics was to me freshman year of college.

I know I don't want it to be easy, but damn, I didn't want it to be confusing and an annoyance.

I honestly thought by this age I would be in a serious relationship. I wasn't looking to marriage and babies. I don't want babies!! maybe marriage??

I have looked at what I want versus what I need. I have listed the things I can't live without. I no longer waste my time with those I am not interested in (like dates with randoms, waste of my time).

I thought maybe internet dating but folks said that was just desperate and I'm not at the stage yet. I don't think its desperate, but at least I can shop for options. I thought maybe speed dating, but no one would dare go with me. Live on the edge a little bit ladies lol.

I have a twitter account, @veronicastorm, where men like to inbox/dm me with their interests. That just makes me nervous. Because I have no profile to base you on, and its too easy to judge your random thoughts (tweets).

So....I think I will just rely on this "feeling" everyone has talked about. Or this "inkling" that will have me pay attention. Or maybe this "sparkle" will appear and some corny love music will play in the background. idk, I would just settle for Jodeci, a king special from Frenchys and a big hug.

Everyone, just breathe and enjoy your day.

I'm Sharing This Video With You For XMAS Joy

Merry Christmas!!

Short&Sweet

Yesterday I got a text that sent me into a quick crash mode. Crash mode is like that ugly slave cry and the inability to speak English. Yes, it was quite a scene. But that happens when a friend of yours decides out the blue they no longer want you in their life. Yep. Short and not sweet.

I even replied, you think I got a reply back? nope.

I get everyone has the right to make their own decisions about the friendships they want to keep or let go. But you shouldn't have to crush someone's feelings in the process. I was ignored for more than a week. It wasn't till I said I was driving over there till I got the short and sweet text.

I forgot to include that my friend said they would always be there for me. Really? Like you are here for me now. I don't know. All I know is you would think that after years of friendship I deserved a phone call, a meeting, or a text when the decision had been made.

So, I guess they can sit in their apartment comfortable with their decision. As I will have to do the same. I just hope I don't have to face a retraction. I'm not a fucking yo yo and won't be yanked around.

Thanks for the real moments and the acts.

Sure Thing Now...

Stopped by Lubys to get my mom dinner last night and ran into an author. She freely shared with me knowledge of her wirting process, mistakes to avoid and her previous work. I took it as a sign to stop being scary and nervous. Just dive in. Better to go back and fix things than to just think of what I could do.

I've always wanted to be a writer. I have concepts in my head. I can visually see the characters, I can see them like I know them. I want to put them on paper. Even if only my close friends read them, it will still be an accomplishment.

There is a void amongst African American fiction writiers that I think I can fill.

So, everyday I am dedicating time to write. And I'm excited to see what happens.

Everyone have a good day :)

Thanks Lil Kim....

Who would of thought that Lil Kim would be my savior today??? seriously though

....everyone on Twitter today is discussing the beef between Lil Kim and Nicki Minaj (#TeamLilKim by the way). So it motivated me to go back and listen to Kim's songs. Umm...hands down Kim wins. But it gave me a little "thug miss" attitude. Yes, in my bedroom, just saying "ugh" and grabbing my "balls." I don't have balls, but if I did man.

in-tee-waze (yep, say it out loud)

....A sound like "BOOM BOOM CRACK BOOM YA BOOM" all on my door. Like if the police were trying to kick in or a scorned baby mamma. Just my mother. Guess knocking and saying "open the door" wasn't enough. Of course from experience I know not to open the door. But wait till she has moved away just in case she's feeling physical (and not in a 80s pop song kind of way Olivia Newton John).

She goes ape shit. Says a whole bunch of things, breaks some stuff....yea, ape shit!

Used to it now. She has alzheimers. Sometimes they don't know how to vocalize how they feel. COuld be pent up tension/frustration from weeks. Could be she just got pissed she couldn't literally see me. Could be she heard me laugh and she's not laughing. Could be she remembered something that I did that actually she had every right to be pissed off. WHO KNOWS!

But.....THANKS TO LIL KIM....I was in thug mode. Didn't phaze one bit. Why? I had "No Time" a great song by her by the way.

oh.....last thing.....Black Friday, Lil Kim's response to Nicki Minaj was on point. No it doesn't have a in yo face beat, and no she is not speaking in different accents to get your attention. she's simply claiming her throne.

in-tee-waze (anways)

I just typed a whole blog.

it was great (well I think it was).

I went ot publish it and poof be gone.

I don't think I can re type all of those random thoughts.

I hope to be blogging more often.

peace.

Follow me on twitter @veronicastorm

Interesting

So......lets jump back in. I am going to make an attempt to blog more often. I always say, but this time I kind of mean it lol.

#UltimateFail Twitter is my new form of expression. Ridiculous. Notice the usage of the pound sign.

Randomly I tried to step my friendship rules up, and attempt to confront, release, comfort, help a friend. Well I guess she saw it coming from a mile away and backed her ass out of there. I just got tired of shaking my head at her, or explaining her to others or hell me staring at her like WTF?? But I now I am ok cuz that's where she is, and that is where she is comfortable. Not up to me to make change.

Update on mi mama, she is doing fantabulous. Not as many blow ups as before. She seems happier. She spent a week at my grandma's and came back cool. For some reason this trip helped her, was a vacay for her. Maybe next month she can go back for a week. But no like I missed her so much. I mean I really did. I don't know how she stomached living in that house alone for some many years (while I was in college). It wasn't that I was scared it just was too much and empty. My dog is back to normal by the way as well. His ass went into a depression while she was gone.

I wish my support group for alzheimers was back up and running. Will just have to find another. But I liked the people and the cookies.

No man. I realized this is my time to be single, and probably willl be single for a while. So I'm done trying to figure out MR.D or make excuses for newbie or entertain a date.

I have some great friends.

The Republican Party is in shambles. They need a PR person, or a life coach. Entertainment for me. When they speak so passionately against Obama all I can do is laugh. Like.....seriously.....calm down.

The book writing process has come to halt. I can't just write. Too worried about organization. Uhh........

Love all....kind of like I love a lot of people...who love me back....