The Cluster

Lastnight I attended a party with Ms. Diva and Ms. Random (she is called this because she does the most random things ever imagined). The party was wack, so it gave me alot of time to inspect the slim pickings available.

a.) The Short Man: I can't put my finger on it, but the look I get from him makes me nervous. I don't know if he looks at me like a tree, or a king size chocolate bar. When he talkes to me, he has to look me up and down throughout the whole ordeal. I guess sizing me up, debating the height difference, I don't know. Either way, I prefer a man I can look up to...

b.) The "I Thought You Were Married" Man: A guy, who I thought got married last year, sure isn't acting like it. The hugs he gave me were a tad bit different. THe conversations he was having with other females was touchy feeley on a whole different type of touchy feeley level. I remember when he would tote his wife everywhere, now she just done disappeared. Makes me nervous, because if I hadn't of gone to UNT I wouldn't know he was married. Because the ring he forgets to wear doesn't give a clue.....

c.) The "I Am Only Talking To You Because My Homeboi Is Talking To Your Friend" Man: Umm....you don't have to! And then when I don't tune into his wack/meaningless conversation, dude gets offended. We both know that if homegirl wasn't talking to your homeboi, you either wouldn't have the confidence to talk to me, or would just look then look the other way. Just needs to stop! Let us not waste eachtoher's time is my motto. And to be honest.....not interested lol!

d.) The "You Need To Smile/Why Won't You Smile" Man: I have talked about this one before. I don't get it. Is that the only line, opening line, you think that would work? Can I get a bit more effort? Guess I am asking for too much. THen want to have a whole convo about how I don't smile, why I am not smiling, what can happen for me to smile, the evaluaiton of the smile......boo!

e.) T.O.: I am not a fan of this football player. First of all, who has a party and then shows up wearing pajamas. Ms. Diva tried to tell me it was some type of linen outfit, hell no. Linen isn't that relaxed. THen had the nerve to be flooding. How do you have millions of dollars T.O. and can't afford to get your linen/pjs tailored? Then walked around the party with his bodyguard....ummmm why do you need a bodyguard? You are not Will Smith, a type of celebrity who could get swarmed. What was funny, was that people didn't even recognize him. Maybe because of the tacky outfit, or the fact he was bigger than his bodyguard, or the fact he was walking around with a stick up his ass. Ummm BOO! I feel like people shouldn't throw parties if they can't do a good job.

f.) Mr. "I Am Going To Stare At You And Walk By You And Not Talk To You But Stare You Down" Man: Just stop the madness. You are making me nervous and fearful of you. I am having to look over my back when I should be concentrating on my dance moves. You could have the opportunity to talk to me, but you are showcasing stalkerish tendencies......wee-oh wee-oh

The party was wack, but it did give me time to really think about what type of man I want and what type of woman I need to be for him.

Answer to previous comment......."Where do I meet these individuals?"

Well, the men mentioned in this blog were at a party. But some guys have been from social functions, to friendship connections, to random encounters.